My DIL Excluded Me From the Gender Reveal Party, Saying I’m “Not Family” — Big Mistake

I (62F) have always treated my son’s wife, Amy (33F), and her daughter (9F) as family. Over the years, I’ve babysat, helped with bills, and supported them through difficult times. When Amy became pregnant with her first child with my son (34M), I was overjoyed and did everything I could to help her feel cared for.

So when I offered to help with the gender reveal, I was shocked by her response: “Don’t come, it’s for family only. I don’t want outsiders there.”

The words hit me hard. I didn’t argue or make a scene—I simply went home heartbroken. What Amy didn’t know was that I had been updating my will and planned to leave a six-figure trust for both her daughter and the new baby. I had even intended to announce it as a surprise at the gender reveal.

Instead, on the day of the event, I mailed them an envelope. Inside was a copy of the will with one note written across it: “Consider this void. After all, I’m just an outsider.”

Later, my son called, apologizing and saying he had no idea Amy had spoken to me that way. Now they want to talk and work things out, but I’m torn. Part of me still wants to be involved in my grandchild’s life, while another part feels deeply hurt and excluded.